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Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts (26 comments)
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Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts

in Merchandise by jon

Monday, May 16, 2005 - 10:06 AM

do not smoke this t-shirt Inspired by the success of our Do Not Eat t-shirts, we're happy to introduce the next in our line of instructional garments, the Please Do Not Smoke This T-shirt t-shirt and babydoll. These slate-blue beauties are printed on high-quality Hemptown hemp fabric t-shirts I've been wearing some samples to get a feel for them over the last few weeks, and the 55% hemp, 45% cotton blend is super-durable, soft, and interestingly textured. As an added bonus, the maufacturing process is environmentally friendlier than the production of regular t-shirts, dramatically cutting back on the use of chemical pesticides, insecticides, herbicides, fertilizers, and excessive amounts of fresh water.

These shirts are a little more expensive for us to procure, so they're selling for a couple dollars more than normal, but the long-lasting nature of the fabric means you'll have this shirt around for quite some time (unless you smoke it, which you should not do). We're making them available for preorder for the next couple of weeks, so be sure to purchase yours by June 1, when they'll be discontinued.
Random
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 2, Super-Genius)
posted Monday, May 16, 2005 - 09:25 PM (#27310)
Can we expect to see the: "Please Do Not Use These T-Shirts and Hoodies as a Suppository" product line next?
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deerboy
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I guess I'm the gay Willie Nelson? (Score: 2)
posted Tuesday, May 17, 2005 - 12:59 AM (#27318)
In Response to Random (#27310):

What? That's not written on my shirt. Otherwise I swear I wouldn't have -

It's a Bloody Mary morning . . .
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jettaboy20
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Re: I guess I'm the gay Willie Nelson? (Score: 2)
posted Tuesday, May 17, 2005 - 11:25 AM (#27327)
In Response to deerboy (#27318):

Apparently in more ways than one.


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zamphir
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Re: I guess I'm the gay Willie Nelson? (Score: 3, Intriguing)
posted Tuesday, May 17, 2005 - 04:39 PM (#27333)
In Response to deerboy (#27318):

It's a Bloody Mary morning . . .

Due to various and sundry irrelevant factors, I purchased breakfast this morning instead of fixing it.

My cash total was $4.20.

Oddly enough, I was still hungry after my breakfast was gone.

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deerboy
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Re: I guess I'm the gay Willie Nelson? (Score: 3, Pathetic)
posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 - 12:04 AM (#27343)
In Response to zamphir (#27333):

Please don't smoke this ASS!
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luvrhino
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pendantry (Score: 3, Super-Genius)
posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 - 12:07 AM (#27344)
How can the UPC for both the Please Do Not Eat [goats.com] and the Please Do Not Smoke [goats.com] t-shirts be the same?

This is the kind of lazy nonsense up with which i will not put.

Also, when might i receive my t-shirt for my Second Prize in this contest [goats.com]?
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jon
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Re: pendantry (Score: 2)
posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 - 10:26 AM (#27348)
In Response to luvrhino (#27344):

Also, when might i receive my t-shirt for my Second Prize in this contest?

You might receive it tomorrow!

But probably not.

I still have to make arrangements for that, sorry for the delay.
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tynic
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Re: pendantry (Score: 2)
posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 - 11:40 AM (#27350)
In Response to jon (#27348):

... on a similar note, I got mine yesterday.

It is awesome. Which is kind of recursive when you think about it.
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Rich
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 2)
posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 - 12:05 PM (#27351)
Jon,

Do the sizes of these shirts run the same as the other Goats shirts? I'm curious if hemp shrinks when washed.


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jettaboy20
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Re: I guess I'm the gay Willie Nelson? (Score: 2)
posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 - 02:09 PM (#27357)
In Response to deerboy (#27343):

You're all about the ass [goats.com] today.

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jon
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 2)
posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 - 03:32 PM (#27364)
In Response to Rich (#27351):

They run large initially, but then shrink down to about the size you'd expect. So I'd stick to whatever size you're used to.
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Rich
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 2)
posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 - 04:40 PM (#27369)
In Response to jon (#27364):

Excellent. My first foray into the world of hemp.

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Shepherd
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 1)
posted Thursday, May 19, 2005 - 06:15 AM (#27382)
On a semi-related note, am I the only one that thinks "hoodie" just sounds goofy and wrong? I liked "hooded sweatshirt." It had more syllables, true, and would have made it harder to save clothing in a fire ("grab my hooded sweatshirt!"), but it was a nice phrase. A sweatshirt ... with a hood. A hood'ed sweatshirt.

A "hoodie" sounds silly. It makes me think of mediocre late-'90s frat-rock bands and 15-year-olds at the mall. I can't buy a "hoodie." It's like seeing a "three-piece suit" advertised as "blingwear" or something. I could buy a three-piece suit. I could not buy blingwear.

That is all. Thank you for listening.
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zamphir
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 2)
posted Thursday, May 19, 2005 - 06:48 AM (#27383)
In Response to Shepherd (#27382):

It's very very hard to rhyme "hooded sweatshirt" with "woodie".

And you don't stop.

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jon
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 2)
posted Friday, May 20, 2005 - 01:09 PM (#27425)
In Response to Shepherd (#27382):

Well, your problem is solved -- I've removed the offending items from the store.

Sorry if you didn't get a chance to order them, but there was a supply issue for these, so I had to pull 'em.
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Rich
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 2)
posted Friday, May 20, 2005 - 02:41 PM (#27429)
In Response to jon (#27425):

Let me guess

1- Small warehouse fire,
2- Firemen downwind of fire,
3- Firemen forget how to put out fire and watch warehouse burn down,
4- Return to firehouse and eat everything inside.


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Lonely Goatherd
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 0)
posted Friday, May 20, 2005 - 05:14 PM (#27433)
In Response to Rich (#27429):

Well next time you should go with 100% hemp, much better for the environment...

this is Jesus's way of telling you to change or perish
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Shepherd
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts and Hoodies (Score: 1)
posted Friday, May 20, 2005 - 08:23 PM (#27438)
In Response to jon (#27425):

My powers are sinister and manifold.
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grjohnston
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts (Score: 1)
posted Sunday, May 22, 2005 - 10:39 PM (#27452)
How is hemp better for the environment than cotton? I know how cotton is bad, but how is hemp any better?
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jon
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts (Score: 2)
posted Monday, May 23, 2005 - 10:33 AM (#27462)
In Response to grjohnston (#27452):

What part of "dramatically cutting back on the use of chemical pesticides, insecticides, herbicides, fertilizers, and excessive amounts of fresh water" do you not understand?
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zamphir
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts (Score: 2)
posted Monday, May 23, 2005 - 11:46 AM (#27465)
In Response to jon (#27462):

So, other than needing more water - organic cotton would be just as good.

Except, of course, cotton strips quite a lot from the soil. So you have to plant it in rotation with other things.

Like peanuts.

Which, when roasted and salted, do wonders for satisfying those annoying ... cravings...

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doriette
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts (Score: 1)
posted Monday, May 23, 2005 - 12:14 PM (#27466)
In Response to zamphir (#27465):

Know what you can do with peanuts?

Smoke them [bradleysmoker.com].
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unFalln
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts (Score: 2)
posted Monday, May 23, 2005 - 07:42 PM (#27473)
In Response to doriette (#27466):

Considering the recent Kraft Bukkake conversations, I wasn't quite sure that clicking that link was the best thing to do at work.
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deerboy
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts (Score: 2)
posted Monday, May 23, 2005 - 09:39 PM (#27474)
In Response to zamphir (#27465):

Except, of course, cotton strips quite a lot from the soil.

What part of 'fertilizers' did you not understand?
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zamphir
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Re: Please Do Not Smoke These T-Shirts (Score: 2)
posted Tuesday, May 24, 2005 - 05:47 AM (#27476)
In Response to deerboy (#27474):

What part of 'fertilizers' did you not understand?

What part of 'reducing the use of fertilizers' did you not understand?

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