I Live In Beer

I'm sure you're not looking for more ideas for merch, but in case you are: I would absolutely love to see some good-quality embroidered (or screen-printed, but embroidered would be excellent) ball-caps. Maybe the Fish from this shirt, or the Diablo from the SPEY pack shirt this year, or Neil and Bob, on the front, and a small www.goats.com on the back. Preferably a dark color, canvas or denim or suchlike. I'd buy at least one for myself, and probably a couple as gifts. Otherwise I will just have to continue wearing my Microsoft Excutive Circle cap and feeling like a sellout.

As it regards the shirt multi-packs-
How about a "beer" shirt multi-pack, with the Litany of Beer and the "I live in Beer" design?

Better yet, how about being able to choose any two or three shirts for an appropriate set discount? For example, I'd love to get the two "beer" shirts and a Voldemort. I don't know how your store system works (and I'm certainly not trying to tell you how to run it), just making a suggestion.

And another request from a peon, sorry: if I were extra nice to someone (I'm not fussy about whom), is it possible to get the shirts in a three-pack in different sizes? My sister badly wants a sporkle shirt.

In Response to Lonely Goatherd (#19357):

People who register have more influence on events. When you do not register you are like the flasher on the subway at 4 am. Unseen and unoffensive.

In Response to breeamal (#19361):

Well, breeamal, I haven't ever flashed anyone, so that comparison is uncalled for. But, I don't mind being called either unseen or unoffensive at all, so in that sense being a L.G. is about my style. And, since I have no desire to "influence events," merely to make a passing suggestion, your carrot-on-a-stick has no appeal for me.

For that matter, who nominated you to police the forums, anyway? I think Goats is a great comic, and some of the T-shirts are equally hilarious, but I don't have to join the official club or whatever to appreciate those things. Thanks anyway.

In Response to Lonely Goatherd (#19364):

There are carrot sticks in your poop? The police are coming?

no desire to "influence events,"

...and yet, poop issues forth from you and your keyboard :-)

You don't have to join the official club, but if you do, you get discounts on the merchandise in exchange for your Super Premium dues. You also get access to the Member's Only Forum, where we practise our secret handshake, and talk about you behind your back, you poopsewing spewpooping pure-spoo-er.

In Response to Lonely Goatherd (#19364):

Yeah, just to reinforce what Teledildonix said...
A) Poop!
B) Registering for a login is free, and fun. It merely allows us to call you something other than Poopmechanista.
IV) You don't get any extra spam or anything, and you can accumulate karma for your wit, charm, and style.

In Response to jferg (#19352):

Knit Hats [goats.com] are cooler than ball-caps any day.

People in ball caps look like frat-boys. People in Knit Hats look like sailors who just got off the boat, and are looking for a lot of drinkin', fighten', and wimmin.

In Response to Lonely Goatherd (#19357):

How about a "beer" shirt multi-pack, with the Litany of Beer and the "I live in Beer" design?

There is one more potential beer/alcohol related design that I have in mind; If we dot hat one, then I will definitely do a beer three-pack.

Don't listen to these obsessives; intelligent suggestions are welcome from anyone.

In Response to tynic (#19358):

While it's possible to do this, it's a huge pain in the ass for us, and until there's an easy way for us to do it (way, way down at the end of a long list of priorities) I cannot recommend that folks do this.

However, if you must, contact me directly and we'll work things out.

In Response to Lonely Goatherd (#19357):

Better yet, how about being able to choose any two or three shirts for an appropriate set discount?

Phillip sent me a good summary of why we don't do this just yesterday:

<economics>We offer [three-packs] because the "value" the readers place on various designs is determined by the demand for that item, while the price we charge for single items is constant. By combining high and low demand (value) items, we can offer a lower price on the bundle by averaging out that value across the items (it also increases cumulative demand for the less desired item). If we were to offer only high demand items in a bundle, there's no averaging out of lower value, so we wouldn't even offer it at a discount.</economics>

In Response to jon (#19373):

and that is why I try to avoid sobriety.

In Response to jon (#19373):

Thanks for the reply, jon, and an interesting economics lesson.

So, if I understand correctly, the reason that you offer multi-packs of shirts is not to provide people with a good deal in exchange for buying multiple desired items, which would be a more straightforward methodology (i.e., people would buy more because you were charging a little bit less), but rather to get rid of less desirable merchandise by packaging it with a minimum of more attractive items. To paraphrase a now deceased Sith Master: "Welcome to the Dark Side, my economics students; your one true chance at $$$ lies here."

In Response to Lonely Goatherd (#19382):

Well, hopefully we're doing a bit of both -- if an exchange is only beneficial for one party, then it's unlikely to happen and won't benefit anyone.

That said, I rarely say no to polite people who email me and ask for substitutions (within reason). Not to say that I won't say no, especially if there are a lot of requests (we'd probably have to institute a policy then, and reject all requests), but usually we like to accomodate our customers whenever possible.

In Response to jon (#19383):

Great! Please pardon my cynicism... my father made the mistake of introducing me to "Bloom County"-

http://www.berkeleybreathed.com/pages/index.asp

when I was a child... I didn't get a lot of the jokes, but the creative bleakness was quite overpowering and formative.

In Response to zamphir (#19370):

Yeah, but knit hats mess up my hair.

In Response to breeamal (#19397):

Yeah, but knit hats mess up my hair.
Who's to know, if you don't take them off?

In Response to zamphir (#19370):

Unfortunately, knit hats aren't good for much in Missouri in August besides making you even hotter than you already are. Ball caps, on the other hand, have a nice brim and keep the sun out of your eyes and all that.

In Response to jon (#19372):

That's ok. If it's a hassle, I'll skip it and just buy two seperately. The only reason 3-packs are attractive is that the shipping charges kill me.

In Response to phillip (#19379):

Because you start talking like a businessman?

In Response to mcgrue (#19422):

General increased brain activity. I don't like to wear my neurons out.

In Response to zamphir (#19370):

Yah, but if you get a knit hat, you might be forced to get a 'porate monkey' hat. And that's no good.

Or maybe it is.

Fortunately, I've got my Food-n-Alcohol 3pack to keep me warm on those cold Alaskan nights. I don't need your stinking knit hat.

sniff.

Nobody ever buys me anything cool.