features

official stuff

goats: the faq
Drew Johnson proves once again that he has too much free time with this all-inclusive look into the Goats world.

goats: the geek outfitter
In an ongoing effort to create applications that no one wants or will use, we've created the Geek Outfitter. The Geek Outfitter lets you organize your wardrobe and stuff like that. It's cool. Really. Let us know how it changes your lives.

goats: the computer wallpaper
A collection of Goats-themed computer wallpaper for your downloading pleasure. Enjoy.

goats: the P3P Transmogrifier
A web-based translator of P3P into English. Originally implemented as a project for an "Online Privacy" class (taught (primarily) by Lorrie Cranor, of AT&T and chair of the W3C's P3P working group) I took as part of my MBA.

goats: the documentary
David Gold, an NYU film student, has put together an amusing and informative documentary about Goats and the folks behind it.

goats: the dialogue contest
On July 19, 2000, many many moons ago, Goats readers were charged with the following task: Just choose your favorite Goats strip from the archive, replace the dialogue with your own using your favorite image-editing program, and email the results to us.

goats: the drinking game
From the mind of the man who brought you The Battle Goat of The Republic comes yet another way to damage yourself irreparably.

goats: the live-action role playing game
Drew Johnson, International Man of Mystery, presents a way to escape your world of stupidity and misery: by pretending to be in a different world of stupidity and misery.

kittens = pop tarts: the radio drama
Jared M. Silver, NYU student and radio genius, has written and produced a stunning adaptation of the classic Goats series, Kittens = Pop Tarts.

goats: the children's story
A children's tale portraying two young boys' search for beer and enlightenment, this age-old classic features laughable art and a soundtrack by Devo, Madonna, and The Three Tenors.

goats: the rejection letters
A collection of the rejection letters Goats has received from comic syndicates over the years.


fan stuff
Think you have what it takes to create an eternal tribute to Goats? Some prose, poetry, artwork, or act of subservience expressing your devotion to the cause? Odds are against it. But send us your best shot, and we'll take a look. We're not laughing at you, we're laughing near you.

lori resurrected
William Wells was so crushed by Lori's demise that he took it upon himself to bring her back from the dead.

glorious, glorious color
Our half of the Goats/Bobbins crossover was colorized by Terrence Marks of the comic strip Unlike Minerva. He even stayed inside the lines.

i know your dirty secret
Roger Sims of online comic strip Just Another Vice delves into the darker side of the Goats world.

merchandising
Iain Hamp of Modern Evil fame burns some wood and comes up with these goodies.

potent pantied ass
This Goats/Star Trek fable by Laura Valentine goes where no fan fiction has gone before. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

everything i ever needed to know i learned from goats
Silver shares with us a list of everything she knows. It's not very long.

jerrell easter egg
Adrian Fowler and his cohorts at MicroMuse increased the total universal entropy by slipping pictures of Jerrell into their Netcool/Wave software.

diablo 2000
Scott Parkerson writes: I think that Diablo should be on the ballot for 2000 so much, I slapped together a bumper sticker design. Whoohoo.

goats: the shakesbeerean sonnets
The Bard of Beer, Justin Alistair Lowde, gives us these tasty nuggets of iambic pentameter (or at least approximating it).

the battle goat of the republic
Drew Johnson's epic stanzas reveal the violence and brutality inherent in our society. Sing along to the tune of "We Are The World" as Drew stimulates your mind and your loins.